I have come to learn that this the toughest range of years in a man’s life. When you’re in this bracket you realize that life was a smooth breeze and now it has turned to a series of hurricanes. These hurricanes hit every single aspect of your life; financial, emotional, social..you name them. When you come to this age you are hit by the realization that you are a young adult and this changes everything in your life.
Most probably you have joined campus and the first cliques you had are just a bunch of buddies you came from the same high-school with or some random guy you met the the registration. You are probably in different courses but somehow you always find time to hang out together. Your parents send you ‘a little’ pocket money to keep you on the go and you can manage to save to some to spoil yourselves for the ‘furahiday’. You get a girl and all over sudden turns all your attention from your buddies to her, you spend less with friends and ultimately you adopt a new set of friends whom you lie to yourself suit your prospective future.
Few years into campus you feel guilty asking for some monetary favors from mum and dad so you start being clever and device new means of extorting some cash from them. At times you feel like honesty is sure the best policy so you call them and instead of asking for cash you end up asking how they are doing and hang up the phone. Well this part of a man’s life is called seeking financial stability. You want to show mum and dad that you are responsible and can take care of yourself just to earn more respect but in the real sense you are just one broke son of man. Your mind travels fast and wild and you start looking for some co-curricular activity that’ll earn you a few bucks. You tell yourself that education might not be everything and your network is your net worth.
Remember you have a girlfriend! Well you have to call her as she expects that of you, random treats, lunch and diner dates, surprise her with something new, take her out, spend time with her (come on ladies, i have even lost memory of all the hings you expect of us but lord knows its one hell of a list, way longer than Santa’s). So you are one guy tryna keep his academic records straight, be a loving boyfriend to your girlfriend who wants time. (Time is money but it wont buy her a new dress!)
So at this ti,e she wants to talk to yo at night, she is frustrated, so you load up your phone with airtime(from the cash you don’t have) to call her, before she says it all your talk time is up(most of y’all ladies gotta lean to go straight to the point). Your whatsapp chats were long and now they start getting shorter, you get a phrase then couple of words then its a single word like ‘okay’ ‘lol’, a delayed response then you only get one word ‘k’ but if you are lucky then you get an emoji. Your calls get missed yet you are still the one to blame (ingredient for a happy relationship: if you win an argument as a man then you have to apologize ASAP!) By now your calls are short and far in between and silence is now the main language of your relationship and your arguments are filled with things you had said over and over again.
So one day she hits you up with that text..’we need to talk!” even Satan himself knows how much we dread that text as men. you get the news you never wanted to hear “you are a nice guy but i don’t feel the same anymore!” I swear nothing below the sun gets a man lost emotionally as those sets of words. You ask her if she really does love him and she hits you with ” he is loving caring blah blah” i don’t know the rest because by now no man is ever listening…any lady feel free to text me what you normally say. You tell her if it make her happy then you are happy yet you know she was your happiness.
Now you are one single guy just having random flings with all girls you want. You tell yourself its life and its hell amazing and wonder why you held on to her. This part of a mans life is called covering up your life and pretending but hell you fake it till you make it till you make.
Enough of that heart breaking story…fast forward…couple years later and you are in your mid or late twenties or early thirties, mum and aunt Susan are pressuring you to get married. So this day you meet a young beautiful lady in her early 20’s. you ask her out sometime and few months you are dating the voila wedding plans…she invites her friends over and in the crowd sits a young man who is heart broken that his girlfriend left her to get married to an older stable guy but this doesn’t hit you that the boy is your reflection..
and he cycle continues